New Year, New Goals
2025 was my first full year doing sex work, and it was filled with ups and downs and most importantly, so many lessons—about the industry and about myself. I wasn’t as consistent as I would have liked to be, but I hope that—as I’m learning more and more about my needs and my limitations—I can find ways to show up more often to this work in ways that are sustainable and joyful to me.
First, though, I wanted to conduct a brief postmortem on all the things that went right/wrong last year. As always, I started the year with a bang, an ambitious plan to churn out tons of content and grow not only in phone sex/sexting but also in fansites, clip stores, and social media. Big mistake! I’m only one person, and my day job obligations are immense and oftentimes unpredictable. I can’t set full-time standards on myself when I literally don’t have the hours available to me. And the sense of burnout only compounds that feeling of failure when I don’t meet my goals.
I let go of a customer who made up a huge percentage of my earnings, because he continuously pushed at my boundaries and eventually said something so offensive I couldn’t forgive. Since then, he’s tried to come back under different usernames, and I’ve blocked him again each time. I always tell my customers exactly who I am, and I refuse to compromise that even a little bit. That lost income was worth it to me, because it reaffirmed for myself that I am a person who knows and respects my boundaries, and that I have a strong enough sense of self to walk away when someone is no longer worth my time. And in doing so, I opened the doors for myself to make newer, better connections with customers who do respect me and what I stand for.
Something that did go right? My explorations in femdom, which is not something I expected to love as much as I do, given my years of experience as a lifestyle submissive. But that’s where I was wrong: it is exactly my understanding of the pleasures of submission that makes me know the right things to say to men who want to give up control. And it feels so beyond satisfying when I am able to give submissive men that ownership, direction, and care they crave. I know what it's like to want to get on my knees and worship someone, just as I know what it's like to want to be claimed, owned, an object of someone’s pleasure. And I am so gratified that I get to provide that same experience for people who crave the same thing. Whether it’s making my cucks feel appreciated, training curious men to worship cock, or objectifying and humiliating the submissives who beg for it, I have found so much joy and excitement in femdom that I’ve decided to lean into it with everything I’ve got. And I feel so deliciously powerful doing it every time.
This year, I’d like to set some more realistic goals for myself. Like publishing one clip a week—and not agonizing whether it’s audio, video, or whether it’s too short—so I begin to develop some consistency to my clip stores. Making sure to talk to my subscribers more often, because I appreciate them more than they know. Developing more themes and systems for what I post—so that there’s a story or a purpose to everything I’m doing, and I don’t end up feeling like I’m posting into the void. Publishing one blog post a month—because even if this blog is just for me, I’m worth the time I spend writing for myself. And maybe, if I keep at it long enough, one day this side hustle that I love so much might eventually be something I can take a shot at full-time.
Until next time.
xoxo
Allie
